Amazon Assures Fans New Lord of the Rings Series Will Have Extreme Violence, Nudity, Incest

NEW YORK, NY – Amazon has released a statement assuring subscribers that the upcoming Lord of the Rings series will contain the amount of violence, nudity, and incest that fantasy television viewers have become accustomed to in recent years.


Eric Drayton, above, is still wearing a fedora even though the hats have not been fashionable in ten years.

Local Man Still Wearing Fedora For Some Reason

LOS ANGELES, CA – A local Pasadena man is still wearing a fedora hat in publi


Former member of The Watchmen, Adrian Veidt, also known as Ozymandias, says he created and released the COVID-19 virus in order to unite humanity against a single threat.

Adrian Veidt Admits Plan to Unify Humanity by Releasing COVID-19 has Failed

NEW YORK, NY – Former superhero and the smartest man in the world, Adrian Veidt, also known as Ozymandias, admitted to engineering and releasing the COVID-19 virus in an effort to bring the people of earth together.


In a new survey, a majority of children said they wanted to be an NFT when they grow up.

New Survey: Most Kids Want to Be an NFT When They Grow Up

CHICAGO, IL – In a new survey of children ages five to 15, a majority of children said they wanted to be an NFT when they grow up.


Winston (above) and Joshua Castellino have not been invited to a party or family event in over a year.

Local Ventriloquist No Longer Invited to Parties

LAKEWOOD, CO – Local ventriloquist, Joshua Castellino, is no longer invited to parties due to refusal to leave his dummy, Winston, at home.


Republic of Rock! founder Chris Markson.

Internet Group Aims to Help Republicans Find Republican-friendly Rock Music

NASHVILLE, TN – A new online support group has been launched to help Republicans find music made by artists that align with current Republican values.


A player for the German Women's Soccer team rests after playing for one minutes.

Olympic Events Changed to Help COVID Affected Athletes

TOKYO, JAPAN – The ongoing COVID-19 pandemic has forced the International Olympic Committee to make several changes to events of this year’s Summer Olympic Games to accommodate athletes COVID-19 related symptoms.


Coworkers Don't Want to Hear About Man's Dungeons and Dragons Game

The coworkers of Ben Magnerson still do not want to hear about Magnerson’s Dungeons and Dragons game.


Teen Jordan Mustaker says he will stay in the hotel room alone while the rest of his family goes to the pool.

Teen Wants to Stay in Hotel Room Alone While Family Swims

CORPUS CHRISTI, TX – A teenager on vacation with his family announced that he will just stay in the room, alone, while the rest of the family goes to a hotel pool.


Adult Stores Struggle with Inventories as Social Distancing Eases

SALT LAKE CITY, UT – Adult stores across the country are dealing with inventory issues as Americans become vaccinated against COVID-19 and the need for social distancing is rapidly decreasing.


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