Trump Refuses to Come Out of Bunker After Seeing Ghost

WASHINGTON, D.C. – According to multiple sources within the White House, President Trump has been hiding in a bunker since Halloween after he reported seeing “a ghost.”


Actors Who've Played Doctors or Nurses Called To Help with Treating COVID-19 Patients

NEW YORK, NY – Facing an overworked healthcare system due to the COVID-19 pandemic, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention is calling on any actor or actress that has ever appeared in a movie, TV show, or play as a medical professional to report to their closest hospital to treat patients.


Black Man in TV Commercial Results in 270 Calls to 911

NASHVILLE, TN – The appearance of a black man in a television commercial frightened white viewers and resulted in more than 270 calls to police.


NSA to Offer Aura Scans, Readings at Nation’s Airports

WASHINGTON, DC – Airline passengers traveling this holiday season will soon get a little extra from their trip through security as the National Security Agency will soon be offering aura scans.


Hollywood Temporary Changs the Way Women are Treated

HOLLYWOOD, CA – Responding to critics and increasing pressure from women’s groups, Hollywood studio executives say they will temporarily change many of the decades long practices with regard to women.


Corey Feldman Threatens to Leak Emails

PAMONA, CA – Former child star Corey Feldman has threatened to leak emails from numerous Hollywood studios unless those studios agree to make more movies starring Corey Feldman.

“If I’m not starring in at least one feature film by the end of next week I will release these emails that I have,” said Feldman. “I’m not messing around here. I’m fucking serious! I have emails from all of Hollywood so no one will be safe!”


Oscars’ Producers Looking to Revamp Awards Show

HOLLYWOOD, CA – The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences is planning changes to the Academy Awards to update the awards and appeal to a larger audience.


Performance of The Nutcracker “OK”

LONE PINE, AR—Four chairs holding three girls and one boy dressed as mice and cracking pecans set the stage for a production of the Christmas classic, “The Nutcracker” this week. The four children, who made up the entire cast of the production, cracked nuts using dolls for an hour and a half.


Father Time Asked to Move End of the World Up

SPACE, TIME – A petition has been delivered to Father Time requesting that the end of the world, currently scheduled for 2012, be moved forward.


Some Famous Actor Dumps Less Famous Actress Girlfriend

HOLLYWOOD, CA – A famous actor has dumped his slightly less famous actress girlfriend ending a romance that started on the set of some film that the couple appeared in together.


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