Beth Sinclair: COVID-19 Thanksgiving Tips
Published October 2020Hello, hello, HELLOOOOOOOO! Oh. My. GOD. It has been forever! It is I, your bestest friend in all of the deep, dark web – Beth Sinclair!
Local Man Unable To Communicate Without Sports
Published March 2020DALLAS, TX – A local sports fan, Derrick Browdirt, has found himself unable to communicate with other males due to the cancellation of all sports and sporting events during the COVID-19 pandemic.
Star Wars Fans Upset New Film Will Include Color Turquoise
Published October 2019HOLLYWOOD, CA – Recently released images from the upcoming Star Wars film, The Rise of Skywalker, have angered a number of Star Wars fans who are upset the film will include the color turquoise.
Fans Start Petition to Make Titanic Ending Happier
Published August 2019HOLLYWOOD, CA – Fans of the film Titanic, long unhappy with the ending of the film, have launched a petition to have the ending of the film remade “so it’s happy”.
Cirque Du Soleil Unveils New GG Allin Inspired Show
Published May 2019LOS ANGELES, CA – Cirque Du Soleil will be debuting a new show based on the life and music of GG Allin this month. The new show, Cirque Du Soleil: Eat My Fuc, is named after one of Allin’s earliest releases.
Poor Rating May Force Networks to Cancel The Donald Trump Presidency
Published January 2019WASHINGTON, D.C. – If ratings don’t improve network executives say they may be forced to cancel The Donald Trump Presidency.
Trump Approves New War on Christmas Monument
Published November 2018WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Donald Trump has approved the commission and construction of a new national monument to honor the lives lost in the War on Christmas.
Random Tweets Reported as Actual News
Published July 2018Due to the overall laziness of journalists, posting tweets as news has become the primary template for most news organizations. For example, here is a tweet where a writer is writing a new book, or perhaps poem about tigers.
This Million Dollar Baby Fan Theory Changes Everything
Published April 2018LOS ANGELES, CA – The internet is abuzz with a new fan theory that will change the way you see the classic film Million Dollar Baby.
Disney Releasing Alt-Right Edit of The Last Jedi
Published December 2017HOLLYWOOD, CA – Hoping to win back white, male Star Wars fans, Disney is releasing a new edit of The Last Jedi with all non-white, male characters removed.
