New PediFile Ready to Penetrate Foot Care Market

COLUMBIA, SC – Manufacturers of a new foot-care product are hoping to revolutionize the Podiatric Medicine industry with the launch of the PediFile.


Local Woman Redecorates Room Before Video Call

LAKEWOOD, CO – Local woman, Jenny McDavid, has spent the last four hours rearranging her office to ensure attendees on a video conference think McDavid has her shit together.


Coworkers Find Office Decorations “Over the Top”

NEWARK, DE – Several employees of CPTB Industries have described the Christmas decorations in a co-workers cubicle as “a little over the top.”


Old Man Remembers Blizzard That Never Happened

DENVER, CO – One of the worst blizzards in Colorado history was nothing compared to the blizzard of 1934 as remembered by local man Wally Nesmith, 92.


Dustin Diamond Called Back To Mother Ship

NEWPORT BEACH, CA – Shortly before boarding the “Mother Ship” actor Dustin Diamond addressed his fans and “family” apologizing for his departure from the planet Earth but leaving the door open for possible future visits.


Local Woman Regreting Decision to Buy New Puppy

DURANGO, CO – Less than three months after buying a Black Labrador Retriever puppy, local woman Gail Freiberg, has expressed dissatisfaction with both the puppy and the decision to adopt the puppy.


Local Man Still Showing Off His Segway

LONG BEACH, CA – Despite a steep decline in sales and popularity, local man Kenny Drew sill shows off his Segway at every opportunity.


Thinly Veiled Sexual Gift Given During Secret Santa Exchange

AURORA – CA, Halfway through the Secret Santa gift exchange at the Peterson, Sloan and Dietz law firm’s annual Christmas party, a gift was given to Victoria Lane that thinly veiled the sexual desire of the giver. The gift, a Swiss Colony Beef-Log, a gift certificate to Fredrick’s of Hollywood and a 64oz bottle of KY Jelly was given to Lane by her coworker James Wazler.


Texas City Completes "Bear Proofing"

VICTORIA, TX – Last week, the small Texas town of Victoria celebrated completion of its 700 million dollar construction project assuring that every residence and building will be “Bear free, now and forever.” The project, referred to as Bear-Be-Gone, took 12 years to complete during which there was not a single bear attack within the city limits.


NYPD Dungeon Shut Down

NEW YORK, NY – In a startling discovery, The Federal Bureau of Investigators has uncovered what is thought to be a sado-masochist “dungeon” located in the basement of the New York Police Departments headquarters.


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