…CINCINNATI, OH – A local warehouse is being transformed into something frightening … upcoming Halloween holiday. The Suburban Scare House will open this week and while it will offer … specific group is targeted with this new haunted house – white, soccer moms. “There is a … for scaring soccer moms,” said Haunted House organizer Jeffrey Tandours. “Fox News and … suburban mothers for years now and this haunted house will give these same soccer moms a chance to …

…Doug could compete with us? Have you seen his house? It’s so small you can barely move around … in the Benson’s plan was to purchase a new house in a nice, upper middleclass neighborhood. They … paid for theirs.” “Once we got the house we just needed to fill it with all sorts of … “The whole time we were decorating our house the people who own the house behind ours …

…Thursday to again remove one of its members. The housemates have asked fellow member Pat Buchanan to … leave the house on his own or he will be kicked out. Buchanan has … began petitioning the other members of the house to get the Hispanic camera guy deported back to … off on a homeless guy living on the side of the house. All yelling at him to get a job and what not. … to make the others wear uniforms around the house and refer to him as Das Fuer.” According to …

…approval rating at an all time low, the White House unveiled a new method for acquiring the approval … a press conference earlier this week. White House Press secretary Ari Fleischer described the new … The polling will be conducted by a White House appointed firm and once results are tallied, the … information will be delivered,” said White House adviser Karl Rove. “Everyone in this … system, a new bill has been proposed in the House of Representatives to disallow media outlets and …

…to a recent report released by the White House, the violence in Mexico border towns has reached … of violence seen in Mexico since 1972. The White House released the report in hopes of giving Americans … stop it from spilling over the border, the White House has offered assistance and personnel to the … Glover or Mel Gibson, if not both,” said White House Press Secretary, Robert Gibbs. “The violence … control before it begins to spill over into our house. We’d send troops but they are all busy. And …

…country can now barely afford a third or fourth house. With the consumer confidence index low, gas … comes time to make necessary purchases like third houses, new yachts or even bail money for their … J. Wolf III. “We voted Bush into the White House to ensure our survival, but due to things beyond … The rich people can’t buy another house? That’s a fucking tragedy!” said Mark … pricks can’t but a damn 50,000 square beach house and they act like it’s the end of the …

…I mean no one, will believe it,” said White House spokesman Tony Snow. “I don’t want to … According to rumors around the White House, Bush is not only looking to top his own scandals … you see what Bush has planned,” said White House Chef Gordon LaFlure. “Let’s just say …

…tramp… then she got drunk and set herself and my house on fire. But then this idea came to me. I know … yard or worse yet, that their gay burned down the house because they were trying to redecorate the house …

…down on the Sterty home destroying most of the house and garage leaving one of Sterty’s children … coldly took from us. If only he had painted his house eggshell instead of off-white, this whole thing … neighborhood. He left us no choice and now his house will be destroyed and his family will all die … committed by Sterty include; unsanctioned house color; refusal to remove dead tree from front … Banding together with other “rebel” households who all had similar run-ins with the HOA, …

…alien race, has been a majority in either the House of Representatives or the Senate. … “Now that we have control of both the House and the Senate, we will be unstoppable,” … the KNA will move swiftly in restructuring the House and Senate into more organized and efficient … in court, you can bet your ass,” said House Speaker Dennis Hastert. “The Klingons will …

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