Restaurants to Server Half Eaten Meals to Children
Published February 2021LOS ANGELES, CA – Beginning this month, several prominent restaurant chains will begin serving children meals that come half-eaten.
Local Man's Friends Still Haven't Listened to His Podcast
Published January 2020AUSTIN, TX –Despite numerous reminders of its existence, friends of local man Cameron Gluick have still not listened to Gluick’spodcast.
Local Woman Just Not Up for 2020
Published January 2020KANSAS CITY, MO – Local woman Sandra Gow says that she isn’t sure she is “up for 2020.”
Christ Apologizes for Meek Inheriting Earth Tweet
Published April 2019WILMINGTON, NC – Jesus Christ has apologized for a controversial tweet he made last month after an intense online backlash.
Trump Approves New War on Christmas Monument
Published November 2018WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Donald Trump has approved the commission and construction of a new national monument to honor the lives lost in the War on Christmas.
Employees Agree HR Guy is Creepy
Published September 2018CHICAGO, IL – During a team building exercise it was discovered that almost every employee of Vrenti Solutions is creeped out by the Human Resources specialist Ben Skokli.
Woman Colludes with Russians to Ruin Ex-Boyfriends Birthday
Published August 2018CONWAY, AR – A local woman has been arrested for allegedly conspiring with Russian agents to ruin her ex-boyfriend’s birthday.
Trump Signs Order to Keep Donuts Whole
Published September 2018WASHINGTON, D.C. – A new Executive Order has been signed by President Trump making it illegal for businesses to sell donuts with holes in the middle.
“We are getting ripped off with our donuts. We always have been. It’s Obama’s fault. And Crooked Hillary. And also the fake news media,” said Trump.
“We are getting ripped off with our donuts. We always have been. It’s Obama’s fault. And Crooked Hillary. And also the fake news media,” said Trump.
Trump Finishes Coloring American Flag Picture
Published June 2018WASHINGTON, DC – After working on it for a year and a half, President Donald Trump has finished coloring the first page of his Presidential Coloring book.
Black Man in TV Commercial Results in 270 Calls to 911
Published June 2018NASHVILLE, TN – The appearance of a black man in a television commercial frightened white viewers and resulted in more than 270 calls to police.
