Avon Releasing New BlaqueFace Face Cream

LONDON, ENGLAND – Avon Products will be launching a new line of daily use face creams, called Crem De La BlaqueFace next month.


Party Goers Not Sure If That Guy by the Closet Is Racist

GREENSBORO, NC – Several attendees of a recent birthday party were left wondering if the man standing over by the hall closet was racist.


Rich, White Men Sick of Being Outed as Racists

LOS ANGELES, CA –Rich, white men from across the country say they are getting sick and tired of being exposed as racists.

“I’m sick and damn tired of people finding out that I’m a racist! I can’t even use the ‘N’ word in the privacy of my own house anymore,” said millionaire Roderick Bennington. “What good is having all of this money if you can’t undermine and subjugate those you perceive as being less than you?”


Tea Party Continues To Pretend It’s Not Racist

VIRGINIA BEACH – VA – Leaders of the Tea Party movement have announced that they are continuing to pretend that they dislike President Obama purely on political terms.


Poor Rating May Force Networks to Cancel The Donald Trump Presidency

WASHINGTON, D.C. – If ratings don’t improve network executives say they may be forced to cancel The Donald Trump Presidency.


Local Black Man Sick of Explaining He Doesn’t Like Rap

SEATTLE, WA – Russell Fischer, a 28-year-old black man from Olympia, says he is tired of explaining why he does not like rap music even though he is, in fact, a black man.


Cleveland Indians Change Mascot to Man from India

CLEVELAND, OH – Responding to political pressure, the Cleveland Indians baseball team has changed its mascot from a Native American to a man from India.


Families Agree to Ignore Last Six Months This Holiday

WASHINGTON, DC – American families have unanimously agreed to ignore the last couple months and just enjoy a quiet thanksgiving dinner.


White Teen "Totally" Identifies With African-Americans

ST. LOUIS, MO – During a casual chat with friends, Benjamin Walters admitted that he, a Caucasian 18-year-old male, identifies with African-Americans.


Local Woman Completely Understands African Crisis

CLEVELAND, OH – A local woman has told her co-workers that she understands, better than anyone else she knows, the current crisis in Kenya because her friend’s nanny is from South Africa.


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