BILLINGSTON, VT – A controversial new law was exercised for the first time late last week as the first Klingon-Human marriage was performed in Billingston, VT. The union between Eric Stepford and Kraftuk Rrralmularshiii marks the end a five-year struggle that will finally allow those of mixed species to be joined together in Holy Matrimony.
“Oh my god, this is the happiest day of my life. Now I can go home and on our honeymoon and not feel like a sinner. Kractuk and I are going to make this the most memorable night of our lives. Isn’t that right Krafty?” Stepford said.
Vermont is the first US state to allow human and Klingon marriages with a new law giving them all rights and responsibilities of any other married couple. The law was passed on July 27 after a five year struggle through the state legislature. Late on July 27th the last block was cleared as the Vermont Supreme Court ruled the law was protected under the Vermont State Constitution.
“Can you believe it? It was sooo amazing when I heard the news,” Stepford said. “When I heard it on the TV, I just dropped to my knees and cried. If I was a religious man, I would have thanked God, but he kinda looks down on people like us. So anyway, after my cry I went straight over to Krafty’s place and fucked the shit out of him. Oh my god, I can’t believe I just used that stupid pun!”
With the new law now in effect, the county officials are getting ready for the flood of inter-species couples looking to get married.
“Oh man, it’s gonna be nuts,” said Joe Preston, Director of Operations for the county. “All those freakin’ perverts comin’ out of the woodwork. You know, the other day I saw this chick with one of those, what the hell are they called… the really tall, hairy things… a Wookie, that’s it. A Wookie, here in Billingston. I mean what the hell is this world comin’ too? I mean one time I was really attracted to this Orion chick but that was just a passing phase.”
Rrralmularshiii and Stepford said they aren’t concerning themselves with how they will be perceived outside of Vermont saying that as long as they are happy, the rest of the world can “go to Hell.”
“SaHlulaHbe, ghu. BlSoy’, ngal, gaHo’. Qachaw (my) ‘ghlntaq.’ CholobHa’ chongor, qaQaw. JlSey, jlba (on your) tln, char ‘ghlntaq.’ MaQong,” Rrralmularshiii said.
In the short time since the law was passed, 653 inter-species couples have been married and another 7,899 have applied for marriage licenses in the state of Vermont. Currently there are no other states with legislature to allow this sort of legal union.