Avon Releasing New BlaqueFace Face Cream

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Avon will be releasing a new face cream called Crem De La BlaqueFace that the company says will moisturize and protect the face and it's not racist.
Avon will be releasing a new face cream called Crem De La BlaqueFace that the company says will moisturize and protect the face and it's not racist.
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LONDON, ENGLAND – Avon Products will be launching a new line of daily use face creams, called Crem De La BlaqueFace next month.

“The new BlaqueFace face cream will moisturize and protect your skin to keep it healthy and happy and it’s totally not racist,” said Avon spokeperson, Venette Dryoski. “The BlaqueFace face cream is intended to be worn all day long whether you are going out for a day of shopping or just sitting at home waiting for your husband to come home. And it’s totally not racist so that’s a good thing too.”

One of the prominent ingredients in the new BlaqueFace face cream is charcoal which gives the cream its distinctive dark brown, almost black appearance.

“We know that it looks racist but it’s not racist because the active ingredient here is charcoal and not racism,” said Avon product engineer, Nida McTighe. “The charcoal is used to deliver vitamins and other nutrients to the skin and protect the skin from the sun and environmental exposure. The charcoal is not there to make this racist. Yes, we could have not used charcoal. Yes it could not have been a dark face cream. Yes we could have called it something other than BlaqueFace but we didn’t and it’s not racist that we didn’t. Because really, it’s totally not racist.”

Despite assurances from the company, some Avon customers are concerned that the face cream may make them appear racist if worn outside the home.

“I don’t mind looking like a racist in my own home but I don’t want to look racist if I go outside,” said Avon customer, Becki Sheridan. “Sure, I’m racist, but I don’t want people to think I’m racist. There’s a difference there. You know what I mean? As an example, I’m definitely going to vote for (Donald) Trump again because I’m a racist and I think all black people should be slaves again. But I’m not going to tell people that I’m voting for Trump because then they will know I’m a racist. If people know you are a racist then it becomes a whole big thing and I don’t have time for it so I’d prefer to keep my racism locked up inside. Like black people.”

Avon maintains that the new face cream is not racist or racially insensitive.

“It’s a wonderful new addition to a revolutionary and respected and trusted line of face creams and it’s not racist,” said Dryoski. “Sure the product engineers could have stopped at some point in the development of this product and asked themselves ‘is this racist?’ but they didn’t. That in and of itself should show you that it’s totally not racist. It’s not. And yes our marketing strategy shows a bunch of white women in blackface dancing in an ‘urban’ way to rap music but this totally isn’t racist either. We totally aren’t racist. The product totally isn’t racist. It’s just a face cream. A face cream that will make you look like a funny dark skinned person.”

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