White Teen "Totally" Identifies With African-Americans


ST. LOUIS, MO – During a casual chat with friends, Benjamin Walters admitted that he, a Caucasian 18-year-old male, identifies with African-Americans.
“I know what it’s like to always be stepped on and bein’ racist at,” said Walters. “Like, I’ll be drivin’ down the street right, and some pig will pull me over for no reason. They totally racial profile against me. Knowhatimsayin’?”
Walters friends, many of who are African-American, consider Walters to be an asshole.
“(Walters) has no idea,” said Jeremiah Venter. “First of all, he talks like he is retarded. Second, he comes from the most affluent part of St. Louis and third, he is more pale than Casper the Ghost. We generally ignore him. Especially when he tries to discuss African-American politics.”
Walters said he has no intention of trying not to identify with African-Americans despite general feelings that he should.


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