BOZEMAN, MT – According to all who have noticed him, the guy sitting and playing guitar underneath the big tree in the Montana State University quad is not as cool as he thinks he is.
“See that guy over there underneath that big ass tree? He’s not as cool as he thinks he is,” said Eve Jones. “He thinks he’s really cool sitting there with his acoustic guitar singing those god-awful songs but he’s not. He’s not cool at all. He’s a loser. And ugly. Which is the primary reason he isn’t cool.”
The guys, whose identity remains unknown, has been spotted sitting underneath the same tree most afternoons over the past month.
“It doesn’t look like anyone’s ever talked to him,” said Montana State University ground keeper Jeb Trister. “I don’t think he cares. He just sits there playing his guitar. Weird. I think he might be the devil.”
At press time it was unconfirmed if the student sitting underneath the tree in the quad is, in fact, the devil.