Disney Releasing Alt-Right Edit of The Last Jedi

HOLLYWOOD, CA – Hoping to win back white, male Star Wars fans, Disney is releasing a new edit of The Last Jedi with all non-white, male characters removed.


Are These Eight ‘Star Wars: The Last Jedi Rumors’ True?

HOLLYWOOD, CA – The new installment of the Star Wars franchise, Episode VIII, ‘The Last Jedi,’ is still several months away from hitting theaters but rumors about the plot have started hitting the internet.


Jennifer Lawrence Asks to be Removed from Bucket Lists

HOLLYWOOD, CA – Actress Jennifer Lawrence has asked every male on the planet Earth to remove her name from their individual bucket lists.


Musician Eager to Disappoint Fans with New Album

LOS ANGELES, CA – After selling over a million copies of her debut album, rocker Terra Tory is looking forward to the new year and is eager to disappoint both fans and critics alike with her new album.


World Still Does Not Know Who Let the Dogs Out

LOS ANGELES, CA – It has been 17 years since the question was first raised but investigators and the general public are still unsure who let the dogs out.


Beyoncé Releases New Surprise 17-minute Long Track

NEW YORK, NY – Beyoncé has delighted her fans with a surprise release of a new 17-minute song called “Where the Hell Are My Damn Keys?”


Man Proves Intelligence by Hating Star Wars

AUSTIN, TX – Occasional film viewer Kevin Mothma has proved his intelligence and sophistication by disliking the new film Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

“(Star Wars) The Force Awakens is shallow,” said Mothma. “The story is so pedestrian. There was nothing there. Just a bunch of loosely tied together action scenes. And the main girl in the movie, whatever her name is, was such a Mary Sue.”


Sex Dungeons: New House Remodeling Trend

TRENTON, NJ – As summer begins, so does the season of home renovations. The cold weather is gone and home owners across the country will begin heading to hardware stores for the supplies to make needed or wanted improvements to their homes.

According to Home Re-Do Magazine’s editor Glenda Hershet, this year’s most popular home improvement project is the addition of a sex dungeon.


Hollywood Temporary Changs the Way Women are Treated

HOLLYWOOD, CA – Responding to critics and increasing pressure from women’s groups, Hollywood studio executives say they will temporarily change many of the decades long practices with regard to women.


Eight Star Wars Rumors that are Probably True

ANAHEIM, CA – The Scoop News has gathered a number of Star Wars experts and identified eight The Force Awakens rumors that are likely to be probably true.


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