TOP STORY

COLUMBUS, OH - Faced with a budget shortfall and a refusal to raise taxes, the Ohio state government voted to sell the state to Google.
With the shortfall estimated at more than three billion, the Ohio state government was faced with limited options to reduce the deficit.
“We thought about everything, except raising taxes,” said president of the Ohio Senate, Tom Niehaus.
| FULL STORY |

DALLAS, TX - Bullies across the United States have banded together to call for an end to the call for the end of bullying.
| FULL STORY |

ORLANDO, FL – Although her family members and friends have tried to explain it, local Grandmother Helen LaFornte doesn't understand “the Kony thing.”
| FULL STORY |

$900 Million Movie Footage Destroyed
Newspaper's 500th Story Doesn't Live Up to Hype
Pothead Patiently Waiting for 4:20
Performance of The Nutcracker “OK”

• Statue of Liberty's Flame to be Replaced
  
• Funny Thing Happens On Way To Forum
  
• Jonathan Taylor Thomas to Star in Next Hollywood Meltdown
  
• Miss Nude World 1971 Comes Out of Retirement
  
• Funny Thing Happens On Way To Forum
  
• New Report Concludes Most of the Irish Population Are Alcoholic
  
• Democrat Updates Blog to Protest Government
  
• Video Game Convention Offers Vision of Future Game Consoles
  
• Hollywood Adopts New Affirmative Action rules
  
• Wynn Adding Giant Masturbation Coliseum to Las Vegas Resort
  

• Local Man Already Regretting His Twitter Username
  
• Time Machine Bring 15 Republicans Back From 1959
  
• Supreme Court to Hear Talking Heads Case
  
• Entertainment Blogger Thinks British Version is Better
  
• Experts: Violence in Syria Probably Has a Simple Cause
  
• High Gas Prices Hurting America’s Serial Killers
  
• Study Finds Most Women Do Not Dig Scars
  
• Video Game Lets Players Control Actual 80-Year-Olds
  
• GOP Asks Council of Nine to Find New Candidate
  
• Co-ed Unsure If She Needs To Apologize After Party
  

• Groupie Accidentally Sleeps With Bass Player
  
• Report: Costumes Less Sexy in XXL Size
  
• April Fools' Joke Goes Horribly Wrong
  
• White Guy Gets Chinese Character Tattoo
  
• Pothead Patiently Waiting for 4:20
  
• Apple to Release Pocket-sized iPad
  
• Woman Reading Book Won’t Shut Up
  
• Performance of The Nutcracker “OK”
  
• Local Man Surprised to Hear Libya Still at War
  
• Meeting About Everything Accomplishes Nothing